BREAKING NEWS: Romney Blames Election Loss on “Lazy” Son
BOSTON – Throughout the election campaign, Mitt Romney’s five sons, Tagg, Matt, Josh, Ben, and Craig, played an essential role in helping their father get the word out. But a … Continue reading
BREAKING NEWS: Obama and Romney Spent Election Night Playing Halo 4
WASHINGTON – According to campaign insiders, President Obama and Mitt Romney spent election night playing the new Halo for hours, occasionally pausing the Xbox game to check swing state results. … Continue reading
Man Uses Robocalls to Trash Successful Sister
TEMPE, ARIZONA – Peter Thompson had long felt jealous of his sister for her various successes, fearing she outshined him in the eyes of his parents, so he decided to … Continue reading
Romney Restructures Wayne Industries
GOTHAM – In a shocking move today, Mitt Romney’s Bain Capital purchased Bruce Wayne’s company and immediately began restructuring it, leading to thousands of layoffs across the board. “This should … Continue reading
Obama Engrossed By Republican Primaries, Forgets Presidential Duties
WASHINGTON – According to a recent report, President Obama is so engrossed with the republican primaries that he’s forgotten all his responsibilities as Commander in Chief. “He spends all day … Continue reading
Solyndra Solar Panels Mistakenly Gave Sun Energy
WASHINGTON – A source in the Obama administration confirmed today that the solar panels produced by the now defunct Solyndra actually gave the sun more power, rather than absorbing it, … Continue reading
Newt Gingrich Literally Constructs Own Moral Universe
MACLEAN, VA – It was discovered today that Newt Gingrich literally constructed his own moral universe, mostly built out of mirrors, birch bark, and headshots. “It’s amazing,” confirmed one reporter, … Continue reading
Oscars To Be Hosted By A Redbox Machine
http://thoughtcatalog.com/2011/oscars-to-be-hosted-by-a-redbox-machine/
Observing the Construction of a McDonald’s
http://www.thebigjewel.com/observing-the-construction-of-a-mcdonalds/ Photo: Wikimedia Commons/Chrisloader
LITERALLY HUMOR 